Realize

25 years is a long time to be on a diet. Or more accurately, to be in a constant state of dieting. It's exhausting. I don't recommend it. I was the chubby kid, always in clothes bigger than my age and always in double digits once I became a teenager. I don't know what skinny looks like. All my friends were little. They were ballet lean and I was a chunk trying hard to fit in.
It took me a long time to realize that no matter how much I dieted, I would never be 5'10" and rail thin. Getting that image out of your head seems like the first step. If you can't imagine yourself as 'skinny' then how will you get there? Are you realistic about your end result? I was not and still struggle with it. I don't have anything to compare it to. I was never thin and I have a really hard time imagining what it would feel and look like. What's your ideal image? (Remember that all the pictures you see in magazines have been heavily airbrushed and photoshopped. You've seen the Dove Beauty ad, right? Check it out here.)

Now, who looks better in a bikini?
Now I know that I don't have to be rail thin.  My perception has changed to fit my own body type. I can be strong and fit and 5'5".
Welcome to the world of bodybuilding...